A letter to Autism. Yes. I used that name. Because I dislike that name. No sense in toning it down here. Call you what you are. I don’t like you. No, more than that. I don’t see you as “just another quality of me.” I hate you. I hate that I’m burdened with knowing you … More A letter to autism
(Side note, I hate the “official” terms for what I am/have. My preferred term is neurodivergence.) I have being neurodivergent. This might rub some people the wrong way, especially those who embrace it. But I’m not there yet. Its been a year since my diagnosis and I’m still angry. I haven’t come to terms with … More I don’t know how to learn to be social
A lot of us claim to be humble. Humility is the idea that we are not the best. We are not the only one out there. There are many like us, many better than us. We can acknowledge our skills, but not brag about them. But at the same time, a lot of us (without … More Negative grandiosity
Its a game by itch.io. But its a meditation at the same time. https://adrianadrian.itch.io/soften-soothe-allow I’ve been instructed to dive back into meditation. I sort of climbed out after trying it for a while. I’m not sure why. I know there is plenty of research on how its is beneficial. Even five minutes a day is shown to … More Soften, Sooth, Allow. The Game.
Sometimes sounds and sights hurt. The only way I can explain it, is like a migraine. When you get sensitive to bright lights or sharp noises. Its gotten so intense lately, a migraine-like thing almost every day. But its not a migraine. Thats the problem. If it were, I could take meds for it and … More Sounds hurt sometimes
I’m an observer. I observe more than interact. This quality has major benefits for my job as a researcher. I sit back, a step removed, and observe the situation. I don’t meddle with my experiment as its happening. I watch. I don’t judge it, telling it how it *should* be or change something to get … More I’m an observer.
Thats the question that goes through my mind so often. I deal with anxiety. Plain and simple. But at the same time, it makes life not-so-simple. If you look strictly at the diagnosis of anxiety, I deal with severe symptoms at times. Well maybe a lot of times. That anxiety tells me I shouldn’t participate … More To partake or not…?
I don’t think I like the rain. Parts of me do, but parts really don’t. At first glance, its a constant noise, drumming on the roof. But when you “hear closer,” its non stop movement. Static. Ups and downs, a constant motion. So much energy all wrapped up into one noise. That energy ticks my … More The rain tickles- sensory processing