Today’s supposed to be a day of celebration- Autistic Pride Day. A day to celebrate who you are, be proud of who you are and accept who you are. Be yourself in a world that’s telling you to conform. Then why do I feel so small? So unimportant? So…less than? Am I mistaking myself? Putting … More Celebration? Autistic Pride?
Yesterday I wrote about how speaking is hard. But today I face another (equally as?) challenging part about speaking. Not speaking. From Friday through Monday, I do not speak. This is not by choice. This is forced upon me. This week, it started from about 11am Friday. We’ll see how long this one lasts. Not … More Not speaking is hard, too
If anyone were to come up to me in person and start talking, they’d get someone who speaks in a blustering, random kind of way. Someone who can’t string together a phrase or a sentence. Someone who appears smart, well educated, but speaks awful odd. I don’t know what its called, if anything. I just … More Speaking is hard.
A letter to Autism. Yes. I used that name. Because I dislike that name. No sense in toning it down here. Call you what you are. I don’t like you. No, more than that. I don’t see you as “just another quality of me.” I hate you. I hate that I’m burdened with knowing you … More A letter to autism
I’m an observer. I observe more than interact. This quality has major benefits for my job as a researcher. I sit back, a step removed, and observe the situation. I don’t meddle with my experiment as its happening. I watch. I don’t judge it, telling it how it *should* be or change something to get … More I’m an observer.
I don’t think I like the rain. Parts of me do, but parts really don’t. At first glance, its a constant noise, drumming on the roof. But when you “hear closer,” its non stop movement. Static. Ups and downs, a constant motion. So much energy all wrapped up into one noise. That energy ticks my … More The rain tickles- sensory processing